Research Pays Off

So, I've never been that great at research - one of the big reasons that I can't imagine getting a PhD., but that's besides the point. Anyway, after having problems with low milk supply over the past few months - it has come down to the fact that I haven't been able produce enough milk to sustain Reese during the day while I am at work and I have had to give in to supplementing her bottles with 1/2 formula 1/2 breast milk. I truly wanted to breastfeed her for 1 complete year - in line with the recommendations from the American Academy of Pediatrics.

I thought that I would have to settle for supplementing her bottles with formula (which was for me a decision I just didn't want to have to make, but a decision that others make and with which I have no issues for those who choose or must make). However, I kept on digging - trying to find a reason that I haven't been able to produce enough milk for Reese.

I have tried herbal supplements, Fenugreek, Mother's Milk Tea, on-demand feedings, extra pumping sessions, etc. But then, I found a number of articles describing a connection between hypothyroidism and low milk supply. I gave it some thought and found that I had many of the symptoms that were being described as hypothyroidism. 1) extreme exhaustion, 2) dry skin, hair and nails, 3) low libido, 4) increased weight gain/inability to lose weight, etc. While I don't have all of the symptoms, I did have many - but I found that there was also a very obvious connection between those same symptoms and being a new mother - 1) extreme exhaustion - obvious - 2) dry skin - well as a new mom you wash your hands often and - that too can cause dry skin, 3) low libido - well - you wake up 3-4 times a night and tell me how often you feel like having sex? - 4) increased weight gain/inability to lose weight - again - w/ a 4 month old and working full time - it makes it hard to find time to get to the gym.

But - all that being said - I called my MD and asked for a thyroid test (if you know how deathly afraid of needles I am you would understand how big a deal that was) and it just came back that I have extremely high levels of TSH - indicating that I have hypothyroidism. Which is great news in that I can take a pill to replace the hormones that I need, however, it also means that I have one more thing that is wrong w/ me. But - alas at least I have an answer to why I have been unable to make enough milk for my DD.

Now I just have to deal with the effects of this disorder on top of the other and hope that everything works out well. Hmm...the life of a new mother...

Pregnant Again?

So, I've been trying not to believe that it's possible that I am pregnant again - and believe me the opportunities over the past 3 months have been far and few between...but it is possible. I have been procrastinating over taking a pregnancy test for weeks now - but it feels as if there is a tipping point. Everyone has been making comments about how funny it would be if I were pregnant again - I mean everyone - colleagues, my boss, family, etc...I am almost freaked out that the more they say it the more it could be true.

It's not that I wouldn't welcome another child - I always wanted 3, but I am so not ready!! Not ready at all - I can't figure out how to even begin to contemplate what that would mean.

But, that being said - perhaps I should just take the darn test...but not tonight - and probably not tomorrow.

Muffin Top

I have this thing called muffin top since my daughter was born - it's when your stomach grows over the top of your pants - strongly resembling a muffin top! I am trying to get rid of it - but it is really discouraging. When I stand up, I don't have the muffin top - my stomach actually looks fairly flat, but when I sit down - it just blobs out and over...I hate it!

I know that it's normal to not have your pre-prego body back after 8 weeks, but I must admit that somewhere deep down I thought that I would. I thought that I could do something different that would put me in perfect shape as soon as she came out.

Alas - that is one more thing that I was wrong about.

And it's all my fault. While I was pregnant I was too worried about something happening to my baby so I didn't work out after about 8 weeks. Now I am paying for that - although I guess since she came out healthy and I had a healthy pregnancy that I should be too upset about it - but I think that I was a little obsessive about not working out - I just had a lot of anxiety about having something happen to the pregnancy or the baby - now I am worried that I won't ever get my body back!

So I have gone to the gym the past 3 days and although it hurts it makes me feel like I am doing something to help with the problem...I just hope it helps!!!