The Photo Shoot

So, darling baby girl had her first "professional" photo shoot this weekend. I use the term photo shoot sarcastically - as it was done by a young girl - all of about 17 and she was anything but professional. As she was getting the large bean bag ready for Reese her butt crack was hanging out in in full view of both my husband and I. Had that been it I probably wouldn't have been so negative about the shoot, but she just had an utter lack of professionalism from beginning to end. The only bright spot was the other employee who helped us pick out our pictures. She was much more professional and really seemed to know her job which we appreciated. But all in all - we weren't really happy w/ our experience at the famed "Picture People"...we might go try Sear's next time as I have heard really good things about their photo studio. Although what I really want is to have a photographer come to the house once she starts to crawl and catch her in action...expensive - but oh so cute!!

However, the pictures came out well. So - all in all I guess it wasn't that bad...

Mornings with Baby Girl

So, baby girl decided that she wanted to wake up early today - which means of course that Mom doesn't get to sleep in. Since I'm Mom - that means that I am tired and now that she is napping, I can't make myself fall asleep. People always say to sleep while she is sleeping - I wish it were that easy. If I could just make myself fall asleep I would get a lot more sleep, but unfortunately, by the time she actually falls asleep, I am awake and thinking of the 100 things that I haven't had time to do.

Like right now - she was just sleeping - long enough for me to eat a granola bar and start typing this, but....you guessed it - I just saw the eyes pop open!! I guess that 15 minutes is enough for her this morning.

Which is probably good, because I was watching My Super Sweet 16 while I was eating my granola bar and - WOW that show is horrible. If people really treat their kids like that they should be investigated by DYFS - or whatever the agency is called in their city - some of this crap is unbelievably bad parenting. I feel bad for these kids.

Anyway - I've admitted to another guilty pleasure - I like to watch what my mother calls "crap" t.v.

Got to run, baby girl is smiling at me and I can't pass up her smiles...

Friends

My parents came to visit today. They live about 2 hours away and they are making an effort to come and visit us once a month so that they don't become strangers to our darling daughter. So, my mother came and she cooked us enough dinners for a week and my Dad covered our water heater and helped seal our windows...it was nice. I also got a break and went out to brunch w/a friend since my husband was working all weekend and I didn't get to see much of him - which meant that I was with baby girl all weekend (which don't get me wrong - I enjoy, but even the best of Mom's need 2 hours w/o their baby girls/boys).

So we went out to brunch - and just had girl time! It was great. I can't believe how much I miss just hanging out w/ the girls and how much more special it makes coming home to a cooing giggling baby girl. Of course she wasn't cooing or giggling this time, but crying her head off - something was going on w/ her today and I feel really bad for my parents because she is normally a really great baby - but today she just had a bad day and wasn't having any of it. Alas, all babies have their bad days right??

Research Pays Off

So, I've never been that great at research - one of the big reasons that I can't imagine getting a PhD., but that's besides the point. Anyway, after having problems with low milk supply over the past few months - it has come down to the fact that I haven't been able produce enough milk to sustain Reese during the day while I am at work and I have had to give in to supplementing her bottles with 1/2 formula 1/2 breast milk. I truly wanted to breastfeed her for 1 complete year - in line with the recommendations from the American Academy of Pediatrics.

I thought that I would have to settle for supplementing her bottles with formula (which was for me a decision I just didn't want to have to make, but a decision that others make and with which I have no issues for those who choose or must make). However, I kept on digging - trying to find a reason that I haven't been able to produce enough milk for Reese.

I have tried herbal supplements, Fenugreek, Mother's Milk Tea, on-demand feedings, extra pumping sessions, etc. But then, I found a number of articles describing a connection between hypothyroidism and low milk supply. I gave it some thought and found that I had many of the symptoms that were being described as hypothyroidism. 1) extreme exhaustion, 2) dry skin, hair and nails, 3) low libido, 4) increased weight gain/inability to lose weight, etc. While I don't have all of the symptoms, I did have many - but I found that there was also a very obvious connection between those same symptoms and being a new mother - 1) extreme exhaustion - obvious - 2) dry skin - well as a new mom you wash your hands often and - that too can cause dry skin, 3) low libido - well - you wake up 3-4 times a night and tell me how often you feel like having sex? - 4) increased weight gain/inability to lose weight - again - w/ a 4 month old and working full time - it makes it hard to find time to get to the gym.

But - all that being said - I called my MD and asked for a thyroid test (if you know how deathly afraid of needles I am you would understand how big a deal that was) and it just came back that I have extremely high levels of TSH - indicating that I have hypothyroidism. Which is great news in that I can take a pill to replace the hormones that I need, however, it also means that I have one more thing that is wrong w/ me. But - alas at least I have an answer to why I have been unable to make enough milk for my DD.

Now I just have to deal with the effects of this disorder on top of the other and hope that everything works out well. Hmm...the life of a new mother...

My Loving MIL

Ahh- I love my mother-in-law! She has been so good to me, to us and she adores my daughter. Why then does she irritate the crap out of me sometimes? Please tell me why!!! There are days where I really can't handle being around her - and I feel awful because she has done nothing to deserve it. She takes care of my daughter 3 days a week, she is very kind and sweet to me, she and her husband gave us their car, she is constantly trying to help if we need it. But yet...something irks me.

I mean I know what it is sometimes. Like when she pats me on the back for what feels like an eternity but is probably only a minute or so - I really don't like to be touched. Or when she makes comments that are opinions, but does so in a way that make them sound like facts...I get it then, but why oh why can't I get past all of that and just appreciate her?

Gilmore Girls

So, I love the Gilmore Girls - it is probably in the top 5 of my favorite t.v. shows - and I have a lot of t.v. shows that I like to watch, but I love The Gilmore Girls!!!

Anyway, here I am w/ my cat curled up in my lap, my husband on the other couch falling asleep w/ our daughter in his arms and The Gilmore Girls on the television and I was just thinking how nice it was to have a quiet night in. But then I started thinking how great it would be to have the Rory/Lorelai dynamic w/ my daughter. But that would mean having to be her friend and do I really want to be my daughters friend or do I want to have the distinct difference of parent vs. friend? I have no answers for these questions...but...of course I had to start thinking about all of this stuff because...well because this is what I do...

A Matter of Interpretation

So how is it that men can interpret a question so differently than it is said? For example, I ask my darling husband - Did you do this? He responds w/ a slight vague answer that does not actually answer the question, but yet appears to. For example, DH - Did you ever ask our friends if they did X for us? His response - I don't believe they did. Now he isn't lying - he doesn't believe they did, but he also isn't answering the question which was did you ever ASK our friends if they...his way of getting around the fact that he didn't do what he was directly asked to do, but w/o lying about it.

I hate when he does that - it smells of a general lack of accountability to me and it pisses me off. But, in my head - it's just one of those battles that I will choose not to fight. I'll write about it, but I won't fight about it...